


Schizoid

by Myriadblvck



Series: KuroKen Brain Rot [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Gen, Genderfluid Kozume Kenma, Kozume Kenma & Kuroo Tetsurou Friendship, KuroKen - Freeform, KuroKen Secret Lovechild, Kuroo Tetsurou is a Good Friend, M/M, Schizoid Personality Disorder, YouTuber Kozume Kenma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2020-12-17
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:15:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28048329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Myriadblvck/pseuds/Myriadblvck
Summary: Kenma and Kuroo eventually adopt a baby after Bouncing Ball co. stabilizes. Kenma struggles with mental illness that makes it hard to identify how they're feeling, it makes it hard to keep steady relationships, they rarely do anything having to do with prolonged social interaction.On occasion, they experiences intense emotions.ORKenma has always wanted one thing, a child. They've always had outbursts of an emotion Kuroo helped them identify as love, and since then they decided that the love was caused from seeing children and Kuroo (sometimes)ORKuroken child fic because headcannon kenma gets his emotions triggered by seeing small children (and now his own child, or children)
Relationships: Kozume Kenma & Kuroo Tetsurou, Kozume Kenma & Original Child Character(s), Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou, Kuroo Tetsurou & Original Child Character(s)
Series: KuroKen Brain Rot [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2054595
Comments: 2
Kudos: 22





	1. Kuroo

"Kuroo," Kenma had whispered when they had seen the baby for the first time, Kenma didn't know what he was feeling. He didn't care that Kuroo was crying at the way the little boy was screaming as air entered his lungs for the first time. Kuroo wrapped his arms around them, nodding knowingly. Kenma never acted right in emotional situations like this, and suppressing the laugh that he wanted to let out was hard. He wanted to laugh at the volume of the cries of the tiny thing. He tilted his head and chewed on his lip, feeling his chest squeeze at the way the child screamed. 

For most of their life, Kenma had been called a cold-hearted person because of the way he seemed almost indifferent to the way people around him felt. He wasn't bothered by it. They called Kenma a freak for not taking interest in many things, not having any friends in their grade, and not caring when anybody praised or criticized what Kenma was doing or how they were doing it. Kenma was deemed as a psychopath. They weren't. Kenma _did_ care about things. They felt things too but didn't know exactly how to put things into words or how to feel them properly, often having frustrated outbursts. They let people call them heartless and cold, because Kenma didn't care about their feelings at all, and didn't know how exactly how to express the way that they were feeling at the time. 

"Akihiko." Kenma had whispered as he held the alien-looking thing in their arms. Kenma had always thought that babies looked like bags of potatoes, but Kenma and Kuroo and the surrogate's baby? This baby was beautiful. "Quit your crying. You have air in your lungs. You're alright." Kenma rocked the baby back and forth a couple of times before the bleary eyes. The baby had immediately stilled and became entranced with Kenma's blonde hair falling out of the hair tie. Kuroo quickly signed the birth certificate, writing down _Akihiko Kozume_ because 'Kodzuken' did not make any sense if his last name was Kuroo, now does it? 

* * *

"Aki, baby, Mama has work tomorrow." The baby wailed in distress as Kenma rocked him, attempting to soothe and quiet the ear-drum-bursting cries. Kuroo reached over to Kenma and rubbed their thigh that was exposed from the long shirt Kenma wore. "You're gonna hang out with Daddy all day tomorrow so Mama can do some fun charity streams." Kuroo tugs softly on the shirt to get Kenma's eyes on his own. 

"Come to bed, kitten." Kuroo stretched his arm over his head, bleary eyes reminding Kenma of the way that Akihiko's eyes looked from the amount of crying he was doing. "He might be crying because he wants to lay with us. He might have had a nightmare. He's feeling scared." Kenma rocks the baby in his arms and nods slowly. 

"He wants to sleep with us?"

"He's scared and wants to feel safe. A lot of kids are like that." Kenma's face was blank, but Kuroo knew that Kenma was thinking about how much he loved the child by the way he pulled the toddler into his arms and shushed and rocked. Kenma grabs the teether from the fridge in their bedroom and hands it to the teething toddler, smiling at the way that he chews on it and stops crying long enough for Kenma to settle in Kuroo's arms and smear some of the gum-numbing gel onto Akihiko's aching gums. 

"Ba...baba ba." The toddler crawls on top of Kenma and babbles softly before settling and cuddling up to them. 

"See. Bliss." Kuroo whispered into Kenma's ear before kissing them softly and then kissing their son's head gently, eyeing the black mop of hair. 

* * *

"Hey, Aki, come here. Don't bother Mama right now. Mama's busy." Akihiko's eyes well up with tears as he stomps his feet on the ground in frustration. "C'mon, honey." Kuroo doesn't want Kenma to get overwhelmed with the little seven-year-old whining and trying to crawl into their lap because 'Mama! Want Mama!'. Whatever that means, Kuroo doesn't have a fucking clue. "No, don't cry. Akihiko, Mama needs to be alone right now." The previous day, Akaashi and Bokuto showed up unannounced and the sudden amount of conversation that Kenma was forced into had sent them into a two and a half-hour long panic attack. Kuroo had slept with Akihiko that night so Kenma could rest and spend a while in isolation with their videogames and paperwork while recovering from the whole thing. 

"Mama! Ma-Mama!" The seven-year-old hiccuped and hit at Kuroo's legs. The child had always gotten overwhelmed when he was separated from Kenma for a long amount of time. Akaashi had once suspected the child was on the Autism spectrum due to the way he would cry and yell if anybody that wasn't his parents touched him. Akihiko had also not begun speaking until he was six, which concerned Kuroo. Kenma said that he didn't speak until he was in the fourth grade. Kuroo remembers that, of course, because Kenma and Kuroo were fluent in sign language due to Kenma not wanting to talk. Kenma insisted that there was nothing wrong with the child and forced Kuroo onto the couch for two days. "No! No, no, no!" 

"Aki, breathe. It's okay. Its okay, Mama just needs some time alone. You can go and play with your dolls and cars and whatnot, yeah?" Kuroo rested his hand on the messy mop of dark hair, which earned a scream and cry of distress. Kuroo was trying his best to now soothe the child with a toy that was supposed to help kids that had trouble focusing or calming down. 

Kuroo didn't even notice the way that Kenma padded their way into the living room. They scooped the screaming child into their arms and rocked and rocked until the child just hugged onto Kenma and let himself be soothed. "I know, Aki. It's just too much, isn't it? Sometimes it's too much. That's alright. I can hold you until you're ready." Kenma's features were stoic like how they always were. Kuroo held back from asking them if they were really okay holding the fussy child that often forced Kuroo to leave early from work because he was crying for his Mama. "Don't cry now, love. It's all going to be okay." Kenma settled on an armchair and brushed their fingers through the mop-head. Soon enough, the child was calm and playing with some racecars. 

"You okay? Do you want water?" Kuroo stood a foot or so away from Kenma. He didn't want to trigger the way Kenma's anxiety spiked when he was crowded. 

"I feel okay." Kenma's voice was monotone, as it always was. Kenma scoots to the side in a way that says they're silently inviting Kuroo to come and share the armchair. Kuroo complies and lets Kenma settle in his lap and lean into his chest. 

"Do you want me to start on lunch?" Kuroo raised his hand in a way that was asking if Kenma was okay to have fingers running through their hair. A small nod put Kuroo at ease. Kuroo ran his fingers through the surprisingly soft strands of dyed hair (That Kenma didn't want to dye for a while) and kissed Kenma's head. 

"Sure." 

That was good enough for Kuroo. 

* * *

As Kenma had assured, when Akihiko started to mature he began talking full sentences and could now spend lots of time away from Kenma (lots being the two or three days Kenma would spend locked away in the bedroom only wanting minimal contact with anybody, Only allowing Kuroo to come in to make sure they were eating) and no longer freaked out as much when people he was unfamiliar with started talking to him or asked to shake his hand. Of course, there was the occasional, 'you're child is very disrespectful. Shouldn't he know that he's supposed to hug his elders upon meeting them?'. Kenma had sneered at those people and replied with some very colorful language on why consent was important and that they wouldn't want their son walking around touching people who didn't want to be touched because he felt like he deserved it. 

Akihiko had grown into a volleyball (hopefully not) phase. He would come home from school with a friend or two and they would practice spiking, receiving, setting, everything and anything related to volleyball. They also often had Kuroo spike or block for them. On this day, however, Akihiko was practicing his setting skills with Kuroo. Akihiko was a very talented setter, watching tapes of Kenma being the best setter out of all the Nekoma team members (in Kuroo's humble opinion) but today he was set to high, too low, too far from the net, too close to the net, even sending a ball over the net. Kuroo could tell by the way his lips were turned into his mouth that he was thinking hard. Kuroo let it go on for a little longer before going inside and serving them both glasses of water that was sort of mostly ice, Kuroo was more focused on why his son was thinking hard about things. 

Kuroo wasn't the type of parent to interrogate their kid when he could sense something was wrong. Especially since their second child had started sobbing once when Kuroo had accused them of acting funny (which they were because they had a tummy ache that they didn't want to come clean about because the poor little girl just wanted Kenma's apple pie for dessert) So, he opened an app on his phone, texting Kenma to come out if they wanted because Kuroo was craving some very needed parent time together. Eventually, Akihiko spoke up softly, "Dad..." he started before pursing his lips together to find the right words to put together to tell Kuroo what he was feeling, "why doesn't Mama like to hang out with me anymore?" Akihiko had hit around ten or eleven when Kenma had started to drawback because they didn't want for the kid to acquire some of the traits his mental illness forces on him. Kenma wanted the child to be outgoing and confident in himself. Of course, it wasn't because Kenma hated the child or anything. It was because Kenma's insecurities (that Kenma brushed off as something that wasn't real because they hate dealing with the feelings of being rejected and abandoned) had gotten the best of him and coaxed Kenma to draw back from their thirteen-year-old son and their ten-year-old daughter. 

"Did I do something wrong? Or are they mad at me?" Kenma had only recently started drawing back from the children and using the excuse of stress and work to help them get away with it. "They don't even wanna talk to me." The way that Akihiko sniffs softly alerts Kuroo that his son has the perfect blend of him and Kenma. He has Kenma's beautiful brains (which he probably got from spending hours strategizing against a boss in a game with Kenma) and Kuroo's self-assured traits. He has the black rat's nest from Kuroo but had taken the dyed blonde ends from Knema. He even had his hair down to around his chin with a nice undercut that Kenma would do.

"Gods, Aki, no." Kuroo can feel his heartbreak. "No, Kenma is not mad at you or upset with you. Honest to whatever you believe in." Kuroo rubbed the back of the boy and kissed his temple, bringing him in for an accepted hug. Kuroo soothes the boy before his daughter joins in, sporting freshly bleached-blonde hair. Akihiko seems to bristle a bit at the fact that Kokome was busy getting her hair dyed by their mother. Kuroo begins to boil water whenever Kenma walks in and nuzzles their face into Kuroo's chest, smiling softly in appreciation. "Look who came to be with the rest of the population." 

"Shut up before I decide I want to kick your ass to the Super Mario realm," Kenma mutters softly. Even if Kenma speaks in a monotone, Kuroo can point out that Kenma is messing with him. Kenma then pulls the hood of Kuroo's large hoodie over their bun. Kenma has recently been wearing Kuroo's old Nekoma hoodies that fit them like a dress and black or red (white if they're feeling it) skirts with some random combat looking shoes. Kenma kisses Kuroo on the corner of his mouth gently before moving to Akihiko and Kokome to look over their homework. "Yes, but what about that information?" Kenma asks in a soft tone that makes Kuroo feel like Kenma was born for the sole purpose of raising their two kids to be the best human beings on the planet. (No matter what Bokuto says about his and Akaashi's four demon children that take the form of little girls.) "Good, Hikochaan." Kenma kisses his forehead softly, and the praise makes Akihiko's mood lift significantly. 

Kokome gets some heavy revisions from Kenma on her English homework. Kuroo smiles widely as his husband fluently speaks English. He doesn't understand a damn word. "There. Now, finish these and set the table. Akihiko, brew the tea?" Kenma asks softly, still speaking with stoic features and a neutral, unbothered voice. Kuroo smiles when Akihiko smiles as if it's an honor to serve the tea and Kenma makes an attempt to grin at the boy. Kuroo can tell that Kenma just wants to sigh and make a face that would look like extreme annoyance and disappointment to wither of the children. It's okay, Kuroo feels. Aki understands the concept of Kenma's brain. He understands the way that Kenma's brain functions and that it's hard to show even a sliver of emotion without looking slightly pained. (Even if he only looks pained because he doesn't know if it's the occasion to smile or what.) 

Kuroo doesn't miss the way Akihiko's shoulders drop when Kenma barely eats and then gracefully walks away to the bedroom to play a game of some sort. 

* * *

Akihiko is inviting two friends over, the same two boys that he's been friends with for years. Kuroo is inviting Akaashi and Bokuto, and the demon girls. Kenma is inviting Shoyou and Kageyama. Akihiko is turning fifteen, and Kuroo wants for it to be the best birthday ever. He wants Akihiko to remember it (because the last two birthdays kind of sucked) because of how big of a milestone fifteen is! That's halfway to thirty! Five years away from twenty! Kuroo doesn't miss the way that Kenma hides away in the bedroom until the party has died down and Akihiko is sitting in the living room with his two best friends, cheekily sharing ghost stories. 

Kuroo watches with a soft smile as Kenma signs to Akihiko that he wants him to come to the office when he has time. He knows that Kenma was nervous about choosing the perfect gift for Akihiko. He also knows that Aki is going to go kind of batshit crazy when he realizes that Kenma got him a gift that's a bit of a big deal. (If he wasn't Akihiko Kozume, that is.) Kuroo grins happily. He knows that Kenma is going to spend the next couple of weeks bonding with Akihiko over the present. He knows Akihiko will come out of it with a fresh undercut and ends dyed blonde, and then toned to be faded from the dark brown (black) hair to the white locks that rest next to his chin. 

Kuroo loves Kenma. He knows Kenma. He knows Kenma tries his hardest to show the way that he feels. He knows that Kenma tries the hardest to try and make Akihiko and Kokome understand that they are loved by their mother just as much as their father. 

Kuroo knows, he always has. 


	2. Kenma

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma doesn't know how to properly show their affection. They count on the people around them to understand that their will to hang out without being called upon to do so is the equivalent of 'I love you.'

**KOZUME**

Kenma didn't realize that the reason why they hated every single person in the class was that they had a disorder. To be honest, Kenma didn’t even know what SPD was when the psychiatrist told them about it. 

“Is that why I only like Kuroo?” It was a lie, sort of. Kenma had played volleyball his whole life (pretty much) and had made nice with the team members. They had become captain after Kuroo graduated. The other people on the team were quick to realize the way that Kenma acted, and accommodated it. They understood. Kenma didn’t hate them. it was more like an annoying itch that you can’t scratch. The team wasn’t like Kuroo, kuroo was kuroo 

Once, Kenma was having an especially bad day with a side effect of OCD, forcing their sets to be scattered and messed up. Kuroo was teaching some first years how to block strongly when Kenma had gotten frustrated because the ball would not set right. it felt wrong every damn time. The third-year had stepped away once Kenma yelled, eyes wide with the fury that nobody had ever seen. 

Fury, frustration, confusion. Kenma couldn’t understand it. Kenma had just screamed at the top of their lungs, grunting and huffing. Kenma repeatedly stomped on the stupid volleyball. “Hey, Kenma. Hey.” Kuroo had Kenma’s shoulders and rubbed up and down their arms. “You need to breathe, yeah?” 

Kenma huffed and pinched Kuroo’s shirt tightly, “It’s not working. It’s not- it’s- wrong. wrong.” The whole team knew that the reason Kuroo would come in when he had time for the practices was to calm Kenma down if something was setting him off. “It’s too much. too much.” Kuroo had signaled for the vice-captain to take over as Kenma hid inside of Kuroo’s open jacket. 

Then, they went to Kenma’s house. Kenma sat in silence with headphones while playing a game. The door to their room was shut for two and a half days straight. They didn’t realize they were isolating themselves until Kuroo had opened the door and fed Kenma. 

“well, you love him.” the doctor shrugged and kenma stared, indifferent. “Kuroo has been the only constant in your life. he is a big comfort for you, kozume.” Kenma had nodded and watched the birds outside. 

* * *

Kenma didn’t really feel the pain that he knew he should’ve felt when his little Akihiko was curled up in Kuroo’s arm crying. Kenma had seen it and simply went back into their office, not wanting to feel guilt for not acting accordingly. 

Of course, kenma cared. Kenma cares about the two rays of sunshine that the fates gave to them. Kenma had seen the hurt on the boy's face when his daughter skipped to the table with freshly bleached hair. They both looked like Kuroo. Kenma didn’t want the children to turn out as he did. 

to show their love, kenma simply praised Akihiko for his good work. Kenma noticed the way he perked up. 

later on, the praise wasn’t enough. throughout the week kenma had been hiding away in their room. Kuroo was the only one that came in and out of the room. Kenma had finally come out. Kenma's little girl is off at a friend’s house left Akihiko in Kenma’s care. Kuroo worked that day. 

Kenma settled on Akihiko’s bed, smoothing out creases on the sheets. Akihiko sat at his desk, scratching away at a drawing. “hey, mama.” the pure joy in the boy’s voice made Kenma’s heart soar to the moon. Kenma truly loves the boy with every fiber in their being. 

“Hi.” Kenma could see that Akihiko was finishing up by the way the pencils were being put away slowly but surely. Kenma took out a device and turned it on to play Minecraft while he sat on the child’s bed. Kenma wasn’t there to push or bother, kenma wanted to simply hang out with the boy. “how was school?”

Akihiko begins a rant about his school day, logging onto his computer. He rants about volleyball, girls, boys, friends, teachers, homework, everything. 

_HIKAKIO joined_

Kenma can’t help but grin at the message continuing to build the castle they had started a long, long time ago. back when Aki was still a tiny thing who couldn’t fit a controller properly in his hands. 

It’s dark in Akihiko's room, kenma notes. the only thing providing light is the windows and the LED lights that Akihiko had asked to be installed when kenma allowed him to re-design his room. it’s each of the children’s fifteenth birthday gift, redecoration. 

kenma curls up in a fuzzy blanket, focusing on the screen and building away with Akihiko. occasionally kenma is forced to drink some water by aki, and they take a break to eat some leftover katsudon kenma cooked the other day. 

Eventually, it’s pitch black outside and Akihiko and kenma are both in kenma’s streaming room, hosting kenma’s stream (trying to see who can speedrun Minecraft the fastest). Akihiko had decided that he liked being on streams with kenma, always popping in and saying hi when kenma was in the mood. he would sometimes force himself into his mother’s lap and take over the stream for a couple of minutes so kenma could go drink water and use the bathroom. 

and, of course, as has the charming, nerdy vibe that his father has, and always manages to have Kenma’s audience entertained. sometimes even being asked if he will start his own stream. Aki always winces with a ‘maybe’ declaring that at the moment he wants to be the best setter in japan. ‘I wanna be better than Oikawa Tooru and Kageyama Tobio!’ to which kenma would say ‘Iwazumi-san and Oikawa-san got married. He’s Iwazumi Tooru, now.’ 

“No!!” Akihiko screeches, taking a sip of water as he is yet again slain by a miscalculated jump, landing on the side of a cliff instead of in the river. 

“Aki, I told you not to risk it,” Kenma chuckles, offering a rare grin. “Now you have to start all over while I make my way into the nether.” Kenma sounds almost ominous. 

“Mama!!” Akihiko whines, throwing his head back and groaning. “No fair!” He had never gotten out of the habit of acting bratty and whining for his mom to do something. He would always grin when he got what he wanted and look at the imaginary cameras (like his father). “You see how they treat me!” 

“Oh, hush. Look, your father is in the chat. Kuro, go suck on a fat c-“ 

“Mom! God! No!! You know what he’s going to say!!!” Akihiko is screeching in false horror 

_Roosterhead: KENMAAAAAA (^^) WHY YOU IFNORE MEEEEE_

_Rooster head: only if it’s urs ( ˘ ³˘)♥︎_

“Go away, Kuro,” Kenma squints his eyes at the screen. “Aren’t you supposed to be working anyway? Thank you for the bits (XXXXX), thank you for the following (XXXXX). Welcome to the fuckin’ stream. Rooster head is a butt-ass butthole who I hate.” 

“Roosterhead is my dad!!” Akihiko grins. “Hello! Welcome to the stream~“ Akihiko waves and smiles big. 

_Rooster head: wtv kenma （＾＿＾）☆ u kno u Luv me I’m in the bathroom rn_

_XXXXXX: not kodzu bullying their husband LMFAO_

_XYZ: bruh... get wrecked kuroo-san_

_TinyGiant: KENMA-SAN!!!!_

_XYZ: oh shit, it’s the other Kageyama..._

_Rooster head: CHIBI-CHAN✌︎('ω'✌︎ )_

_TinyGiant: KUROO-SAN!!!_

_TinyGiant: KOZUME-SAN!????? IDK WHO TOOK WHOS NAME I FORHRIRJ_

_TinyGiant: HELLO TETSU-CHAN✌︎('ω'✌︎ )_

_Rooster head: TELL TOORU TO FUCK OFF W HIS NICKNAMESNAN_

_ZZZZ: LMFSO I OOV IT WHEN KODZUS FRIENDS COME ON CHAT_

_FSUS: IKR??? donated $76_

“Hey, don’t give me money. I’ve banned you before FSUS, I’ll do it again.” Kenma tsks, “Hello Shou.” Kenma grins again. “How was your day?” The chat once again explodes with laughter about how kenma treats them both differently. Akihiko keeps trying to out-speedrun kenma. 

Kenma looks over to their boy and smiles softly. Akihiko is back to his cheery self, and kenma is relieved. 

**Author's Note:**

> Here's Kuroo's POV of the way that Kenma interacts with lil' babe Akihiko. Do we want a full fic? LMK if anybody does! next chapter is Kenma's POV as they try to unpack all of their feelings and understand everything. 
> 
> Leave a kudos and maybe a comment? They make me v happy. 
> 
> This is also based on a prompt I received in a Fanfiction Writing class to write something about a mental illness that a lot of people demonize (Next chap we are getting a peek at schizophrenia) and that the media also portrays as something awful. I decided to write about this specific mental illness because it is one that isn't very well talked about. I also have always head-cannoned that Kenma has this disorder and felt like it was time to put it to a short fic to help cope with the small writers' block I am experiencing due to small depression relapse. Other than that, though, I really liked writing this chapter from Kuroo's perspective. I also might do an Akihiko chapter so we can get his feelings, not sure yet. 
> 
> Drink water! Eat! Exercise! Take care of yourselves ladies and gentlemen and gentle-thems! ily if ur reading this muah.


End file.
